Perimenopause in a Room Full of Dudes
Here’s something they don’t tell you in your twenties: one day you’ll be in a boardroom, discussing digital transformation or AI roadmaps, and your body will decide to light itself on fire from the inside out. No warning, no escape hatch, just a hot flash while the guy across the table is droning on about cloud migration.
Perimenopause is like fighting an invisible opponent. You can’t see it, can’t schedule it, and nobody in the room is talking about it. Especially when the room is full of dudes.
The Unspoken Battlefield
I’ve spent more than 20 years in male-dominated industries. I’ve handled egos, politics, and more acronyms than should exist. But nothing prepared me for perimenopause sneaking into my workday like an uninvited guest.
Brain fog during a high-stakes pitch? Check. Mood swings while managing a team? Double check. The kind of exhaustion that makes you wonder if gravity got turned up overnight? Oh yeah.
And the kicker: you can’t exactly pause the meeting and say, “Sorry, gentlemen, my estrogen levels are freefalling today.”
Silence as the Default Setting
When men get older in the workplace, they’re “seasoned,” “experienced,” or “mentors.” When women hit perimenopause, we’re… silent. Because talking about hormones is still treated like oversharing.
So we adapt. We over-caffeinate, over-prepare, and quietly carry the weight. We pretend nothing’s happening while fighting our bodies in real time. It’s a hell of a thing — giving 110% at work while your system is running on what feels like dial-up internet.
What Climbing Taught Me About This Phase
Climbing doesn’t care if you’re hormonal. The wall doesn’t lower its difficulty because you didn’t sleep or because your body’s in mutiny. You either find a way to make the move or you fall and try again.
That’s the mindset I bring to perimenopause at work.
- Adapt the beta. If a route feels impossible, you try a different sequence. Same with managing energy — maybe it’s breaking tasks into sprints instead of marathons.
- Focus on grip strength. Literally and figuratively. I double down on strength training and nutrition because those give me stability when hormones don’t.
- Don’t climb alone. You need belayers you trust. Same with work — find the people who’ve got your back so you’re not white-knuckling through it all alone.
Family Doesn’t Get the Filter
At home, there’s no performance mask. My husband of 20 years, my teenagers, and my dogs get the unedited version: me trying to balance parenting, marriage, and mood swings that feel like they were scripted by Tarantino. It’s not pretty, but it’s honest. And honestly? That’s where I get to drop the act.
Closing Thought
Perimenopause in a room full of dudes is like being in a fight scene you didn’t audition for. You’re throwing punches blind, trying not to let the sweat show, and still expected to hit your marks.
I don’t bring it up to complain. I bring it up because it’s real — and pretending it doesn’t exist doesn’t make it easier. What makes it easier is grit, discipline, a sense of humor, and the occasional reminder that you’ve crushed harder routes than this.
No excuses. Just another climb.
